Speaking Your Mind

I've had a Facebook account for a good three years now. Never once did I make a comment on a post that I thought would spark a debate. Never once did I try to put my foot into an argument, whether I knew I could defend myself or not. Never once did I speak my mind on a status that was asking for my opinion on a controversial subject.

Now Facebook has died down in popular over the past year in terms of the amount of teenagers who use it. Most of us have moved on to Twitter and Instagram, although we occasionally venture back on to Facebook. And I did just that the other day, expecting to see nothing more than a couple of "truth is..." statuses and pictures of people's most recent vacations.

But a post caught my eye, and what it said I'd prefer not to go into any detail. Long story short, a kid who only knew the stereotypes of an organization was making an assumption and one that I thoroughly did not agree with. Like I said, I usually don't comment on these things, but I thought, "Hell, why not. Nobody gets on here anyways."

And I did.

I spoke my mind and explained to the kid that the preconceived notion that he has of this orginaztion is not even true. I informed him on what they really do in what I thought was a classy and well thought out response. In all he was bashing an action in his post and not the organization itself, so I thought it would rollover well.

Mistake.

I received a comment from him, his mom, and a lady that I don't even know telling me that it didn't matter because they still did a certian "action" in that organization and the organziation also supported something that their branch of Christianity didn't support. They picked and chewed my response apart and ignored the good things and took the one thing they thought was bad and basically chewed me out about it. And it wasn't even a bad thing, it was just something that their religion did not support although other sections of Christianity have no problem with it. (Sorry if this is getting kind of confusing, just bear with me.)

But now I have this sort of Americano feeling. The quiet people who sit in a chair and sulk in the corner never change the world, ya know? And no, I'm not changing the world by speaking my mind (at this particular time anyhow), but there's just something about using your freedom of speech that makes you feel good. If anything, responding to his post has made me more apt to speak my mind, whether or not I know I'll stir the pot with my comment.

So go out there and comment and speak your mind and support what you believe in and express how you feel. Change the damn world.

Also, anybody know of a good protest nearby, because I'm in the mood to use my first amendment.

Have a fabulous day.

Poetry Mondays: Kindergarten

(Note: I posted this a couple of Mondays ago but Blogger was being a bitch and deleted it for some reason, so I hope you don't mind the repost.)

Ten thousands crayons
all in a box.

Fat sharpened pencils
to write out our thoughts.

Blank paper to fill
with our hearts content.

And tons of well used toys
full of knicks and dents.

It's only the beginning
of your schooling career.

The start of a long journey
full of happiness, rough days, and tears.

It's a milestone on the path
of becoming who you're destined to be.

One more hurdle
before you become free.

As you're parents let go of you
one finger after the other,

As you say goodbye
to your dad and your mother,

You're beginning the journey
that is now due,

The journey that makes
you, you.


Have a fabulous day.

1,000 VIEWS

I started this blog for pure fun. I thought it'd be something cool to do and look back on and a place for me to write. When I was in middle school I wrote stories. I have a laptop sitting in my room that is full of at least twenty five word documents of half written stories. Someday I'll go back and read through them and maybe even pick up where I left off, but this blog has been my new writing outlet.

And I love it.

And I love you! (All ten of you!)

But seriously. I freaked a little bit when I logged on to Blogger and saw this:

Now, 1,000 views really isn't that much especially in comparison to other blogs out there, but never did I think that anyone would see this blog yet alone 1,000 (unless there's someone out there who has viewed my blog a thousand times, either way, I'm thrilled).

And the best part is, is that it can only grow from here.

Have a fabulous day.

Texas Y'all

(Not only did I make a new header, but I also completed the Texas post. I'm crossing things off my to-do list y'all.)

I spent my time last week in Texas. It's definately not one of my favorite cities as I'm not a big fan of the heat I experienced there (or the hotel we were staying at), but it was nice to visit somewhere new. They're a state rich with cultural and many interesting sites to see.

I stayed in San Antonio where I remembered the Alamo, visited Sea World, and toured the river walk. Also if you're ever visiting, be sure to check out a little Mexican store (I say that with no intentions of racism, it was a store that sold many items from Mexico). It sells the coolest little knick-knacks where I bought a neat handpainted skull similar to the ones I've read about in textbooks that are used for Dia de Muertos. I can't exactly give you a street address or anything, but it's on the same road as the next place I'm about to recommend to you, just a little farther down and I'm sure you could ask locals about it. And I also recommend Jackalope Joe's, which is another neat little store who had one of the nicest sales ladies I'd ever met (if you type in Jackalope Joe's San Antonio in Google you can get the address, there's only one).

There's not much more to talk about, but a couple of pictures to share.

*insert childlike chant here*
M-I-SS-I-SS-I-PP-I

Thanks to the riverwalk, there were beauitful
bridges placed everywhere in the city.

And a big shout out to the city of San Antonio for putting on a fabulous firework display. It was hands down the best firework show I'd ever sat through.

For our flight home, we had to get up at 3:30 in the morning, but the view a couple of hours later in the sky was totally worth it. Best sunset of my life and totally something everyone should add to their bucket list.

And sorry for the lack of pictures. I took plenty of them in Texas but most of them were group pictures or pictures of myself/myself and friends and I'm not really that keen on revealing who I am. Usually when I go places I try to take specific pictures for the blog and there wasn't too much time for that. 

But anyways, have  fabulous day.

The To-Do List That Will Never Gets Done

I made myself a mental to-do list last night as I went to bed. It was a list of things that I've been meaning to do for quite some time now.

The list went a little something like this:
1. Make a new header for the blog.
2. Wash the clothes that are sitting in my suitcase.
3. Edit the pictures from Texas.
4. Start writing the Texas blog post and preferably get it published.
5. Bake cookies (this was about the only thing that got done).
6. Vacuum my room.

Like basically all teenagers, I suffer from a disease known as procrastination. And if you've found the cure, please share. And if you don't suffer from this debilitating illness, then you can go screw yourself in a hole. (Edit: after checking over this post, I have realized that that last sentence was a little harsh and inappropriate. Sorry about it.)

One of my favorite pictures of my dog. And I  swear
I wasn't holding her under her mouth so she'd look
at the camera it's just her favorite place to be scratched.

More often than not, my to-do lists roll over to the next day. But why is it that we assume that there will be a next day? I've often heard the phrases, "Oh, that can wait till tomorrow." or "It's alright, there's always next week." We as teenagers and even as humans, have this notion that we are invincible. Not in terms of we can go jump off a mountain and get back up unscathed, but we have this preconceived idea that there's no way we can die tomorrow. Or next week. Or next month. Or next year. Or even in the next ten years.

Statistically, we (as in teenagers) probably won't die very soon. Which is why the stories of people who die young hit hard because we think we're guaranteed a long life and this news snaps us back to reality.

And maybe I didn't finish everything on my list. But I went out and took a couple of new pictures, something that I've been putting off for weeks. I spent a few hours at a neighbor's pool reading a new book I picked up at the library. I got caught up on all my favorite TV shows that I missed while I was in Texas. I had an overdue dinner date with two of my close friends. I did things that were on my personal favorite to-do list, the list of things that are more like wants rather than needs.

And to be honest, we'll never truly mark everything off of our to-do lists. There will always be something that you'll have to wait till tomorrow to finish. They're always be something that you just couldn't finish in that 24 hour period. We are constantly adding new things to make an infinite list, creating the to-do list that will never get done.

So go check things off of your 'want to do' to-do list, because it's always so much more fun.

And if you do wake up tomorrow, remember to make it fabulous.

Poetry Mondays: The Door of Life

What happens when
the door of life closes?
Does it lock,
never to be re-opened?

Can you float
in and out?
Visit the other world,
taking your own route?

Does it hurt,
will it sting,
do you even
feel a thing?

Will I see God,
will I see clouds,
will I see people
standing in a crowd?

How long until
my hourglass
of sand
runs out?

How long until
I rise into
my home
above the clouds?

So many
age old questions
and new one's
too.

That will never be answered
because once I find out
I won't be here
to tell you.


Hope you had a fabulous day.

Feeling Unloved

I made a wish last night at 11:11. Typical white girl, I know. And usually I wish for something stupid like, "I wish that tomorrow will be great"  or "I wish that I make an A on that test". It's usually dumb or trivial things that I wish for, things that have a pretty good chance of happening whether I made that wish or not. But I suprised myself last night.

When I noticed the time on my iPhone, I shut my eyes and sat there for a second or two. What is it that I really want? I actually took into careful consideration over what I was wishing for, as if the wish was guaranteed to happen. And the weird thing was, I didn't try to process what I was wishing for. I didn't neccessarily think about it, I just tried to find what was really bugging me at the moment. Finally, my mind blurted out, I wish that I felt loved.

I wasn't expecting that at all. As crazy as that seems, my mind totally went out on it's own. But when I really thought about it, I was feeling alone and confused and unloved. Those feelings don't come around all too often (thank God) but when they do it stings. It stings all over my body. I get that gut wrenching feeling, the same feeling you get when you realize you left your homework at home or realize that your friend is talking about you behind your back. It's like a pang of disappointment and then it fizzles out into sorrow and distress.

I also have the tendency to not truly think about how I feel about certain situations. Usually my mind doesn't sort it all out until I'm trying to go to sleep, the universal place where all unhappy things come back to haunt you.

After a lot of thinking and recapping of my day, it turns out I should have been feeling unloved or unwanted at certain times. Girls exclude each other. Girls say things they shouldn't. Girls don't say things when they should.

My day wasn't totally awful, but I had a couple of rough spots that made me feel uneasy. It's funny how you can be surrounded by people and yet feel alone. I could have all the friends anybody could ever want, but I would still feel as if I was just there. Like my friends keep me around because I've there for so long. They just let me stay to be nice. Like I'm of no use in their workplace of friends, just kind of the employee that nobody wants to let go even though they are of no use anymore to the company.

I almost feel like the feeling of being unloved is merely psychological. You're friends don't really talk about you as much as you think they do. They love you more than you think they do. They want to be around you more than you think they do. The feeling is also mutual. They probably think you talk about them more than you do. They probably think you don't love them as much as you really do. In reality, both you and your friends have felt unloved by each other.

I wish I had a cure for it though. A medicine that takes away the nasty feelings of life. I don't have some simple thing that you can do. I don't have the answers, although I wish I did.

Life's getting pretty complicated. Maybe next time I should wish to become a cat.

Have a fabulous Sunday.

(More on my most recent trip later.)