I've gotten a surprising boost in my blog traffic since my first high school post. It was a tad ridiculous how excited I got, but hey, whatever makes you happy.
Spring has finally come out of the closet this week. Flowers are sprinkled across my yard, the weather has jumped a good ten degrees, and for the first time in nearly five months, I've worn sandals to school. SANDALS. I've been confined to my Toms, Vans, and two pairs of flats for like freaking ever because my mom refuses to allow me to wear open toed shoes in cold weather, although I'd put up with some pretty sick and miserable things for fashion.
As warmer days are approaching, I've spent more time with my friends being social and such. I'm a child who enjoys being alone to an extent, so friendship time is much needed at times.
Contradictingly (is that even a word?), I feel that you need to learn to be alone. Because at the end of the day all we have is who we truly are. And that scares me a little.
It scares me a lot.
And don't get me wrong, I love thinking about my life. I retell stories to myself. Relive my favorite moments. Dwell on my accomplishments. But sometimes that's not enough and that's what scares me the most. Could I have done more? Should I have done less? I want what's left of me at the end of the day to be something wonderful and beautiful and inspiring and just flipping great.
Just flipping great.
Is that too much to ask for?
Every night I have a routine.
Set my alarm.
Check la social media.
If anybody listened in on my prayers they'd probably think I'm asking too much, giving too little. I pray to do flipping great on my biology test. I pray to do flipping great at my soccer game. I pray to do flipping great at everything that comes my way. (Okay, maybe I don't use the phrase flipping great, but it is a pretty flipping great two words.) My requests are small, stupid to some. But that's what matters now and in fifteen years when I've got bills to pay and mouths to feed, I'll wish that my only worry is to do well on a test.
So go out and make tomorrow flipping great.
And flipping fabulous. Make tomorrow fabulous.