Rambling Thoughts

I've been feeling rather inspired lately, but oddly enough, the feelings can't be put into words; my inspiration doesn't come in the form of blog posts or ideas—mostly just happiness. Which is about the only way I can describe my feelings: fulfillment, happiness, and contentedness. I'm finding joy in my strengths and even a sense of acceptance in my faults. Some things about me can be changed, and yet, other things cannot, and I am finding that it is important that I understand and learn to love my shortcomings that cannot be transformed.

As college approaches I'm scrambling to find out who my 18 year old self is. A lot of importance is placed on starting over in college, and I'm hoping to realize who I am so I can pick and choose the friends and activities that will best mesh and reflect me. Of course this is all easier said than done—who I am now will not be who I am in a year or even a month, and I'm sure I really won't completely "find myself" by the end of the summer. It is just a thought I want to keep in my mind and try my best to strive for.

I don't want to set the bar too high for summer this year as nothings worse than disappointing your own expectations, yet I digress. I'm going to be doing a bit more traveling than usual this summer (including a relatively solo trip to NYC with a good friend of mine) which makes me utterly excited. I'm also on the lookout for inspiration during the coming months—music wise, book wise, movie wise. I came across a documentary called "All This Panic" about a handful of girls coming to age in New York City, and I desperately want to attend a showing of it (although sadly, I live in the middle of nowhere especially in terms of the art world, and I'm having the worst time finding it on my next best option, the Internet). I'm realizing that I am becoming less and less fascinated in fantasy based things and more and more intrigued with thought provoking, non-cliche works of art. Anyways, music/book/movie suggestions are appreciated!

An old picture from my first visit to NYC

I'm happy to be back blogging friends, I'm happy to be back. Have a fabulous day.

Living

This is a blog post well overdue. Nearly four months overdue, yet I digress. As nearly all of my hiatuses, this was totally unintended. One week shed into the next and before I knew it, it was May and I hadn't read a blog post nor posted one since mid January. What can I say except I was living. As my final semester of high school wrapped up this week, I realized how little attention I had been paying to my blog, something that makes me bittersweet. When I scroll through my blog, I take notice of the times where I didn't post for a few weeks—usually due to the fact that I was, well, living. It makes me sad in the sense that I wished I could better document these times of living, but I will take the silence as an intuition of my time. I have always commented that I love how this blog has acted as a diary of my high school years, so the lack of posts during my final months of high school is a little unsettling, but there are other things more worth my time that I can fret over.

Hopefully, I'm back for good. I am currently struggling over the humongous task of catching up on reading four months of blog posts from all the blogs I follow (a task I am not even sure I can take on). Regardless, I hope that I absence of classes and work will allow me to better allocate my time resulting in more blog posts.

How my life felt in gif form, going from one place to the next.

Of course, have a fabulous day.